So many questions have been whirling around...mostly from other people. What are you going to wear? What's the route? What time does the race start? Do you have a goal time? How's your injury? And so on.
I don't know the answers to most of those questions. In fact, I figure I'll know only two of them the day before (what time the race is & what I am wearing) & other than that, I won't know until some time during the race.
There's only one question I care about right now. Am I mentally tough enough?
I am a competitor, but my background is in team sports. I never had a problem carrying a team on my back playing college volleyball. I could rally the whole team & get them to play up & play better & push. As a college coach, if I didn't have a player that could do this, I could find a few players to train to be mentally tough & take that task on.
This is a whole different game.
I know physically, I've got this race...even with my injury. I've done all the work. The hard part is over.
The question that lies, am I mentally tough enough to carry myself for all 26.2 miles? I know I can run the mileage, but do I have what it takes to push through when it hurts & when I don't want to run anymore...when I would rather just jog/shuffle to the finish line...
A true athlete & competitor can probably do both & transition between individual & team sports at ease without ever losing any mental toughness. I don't know if that is me.
My role of mother is just an extension of what my entire athletic/coaching career was...team sport. Team Beland. Rallying the troops...taking care of the ones in need, motivating all the time, & pushing to move forward when necessary...This is motherhood, & we all do this. We are the captains of our team. But, in some ways, that's easy. To put the team's needs before your own....it's a selfless role but one that comes naturally especially to those that have played team sports.
This race is definitely outside of my comfort zone because it's long enough that I know I will need to rely on more than just physical strength. There is no one on the bench pulling you aside to re-focus. No one threatening "Suicides" if you don't get your head in the game. No timeouts, no substitutions....just me.
So no, I don't know what I'm wearing. I have no idea of the route & no plans to look it up. Yes, my achilles hurts, don't know what it will feel like race day. I have no idea how long it will take me... I think the race starts at 8? I might look that one up.
Am I tough enough to motivate, encourage, & push myself? I'll let you know next Sunday.